I’m at work and my Apple Watch reminds me with a chirpy little *ding* and a text that it’s time to stand up (funny how this NEVER happens when I’m in New York 😂). So I oblige… I push back from my desk, stretch, and take a short walk. To the back of the office. To the kitchen. Where the cookies live. Just as I … Continue reading Bite Of The Apple

When cell phones first came out, they had a plethora of ringers and tones to choose from, which seemed like a great idea. Choices! Woo hoo! I can waste 90 minutes of my day scrolling through (annoying) sounds while whoever is within earshot secretly plots to smother me in my sleep. The year is 2001, and I finally settle on one that is (in my … Continue reading Woke Up, It Was a Zombie Morning

Just spent an hour and a half driving through the backwoods of Nowhere, USA. All I can say is that the cute boy and the GPS Bitch need to go to couples’ counseling! Continue reading Roadmap Rage

Will terrycloth make a comeback? I keep packing and unpacking my summer clothes. How about corduroy?  My fall wardrobe may need a refresher course. In other news, I had to talk-to-text the word “corduroy”. Continue reading Out of Fashion

Day 10 of no sugar/carbs (I fell off the wagon a while back) and you know what I *really* want for dinner? A King-Size Snickers wrapped in a tortilla between two slices of bread, battered and deep-fried, dusted with powdered sugar and drizzled with raspberry sauce. And a side of macaroni and cheese. And French fries. Continue reading Craving

I would like to have a conversation with the designer who created super comfy cotton pajamas. You know the ones. The material feels like a cloud. Like angels’ wings… Yet they always seem to have 78 tags made out of aluminum foil. I feel like I should get some sort of discount for all the holes in the side and the neck. Because there is … Continue reading The Hole Problem

When somone dies and the coroner needs dental records to identify the body, that means the teeth are the only thing to survive. I think I have the Tooth Fairy figured out now.  She’s been collecting teeth for centuries. You know all the earthquakes and hurricanes we’ve been having? When the world ends, that damn Fairy will be the only one left standing, because she … Continue reading She’s Fairy Smart

We were enjoying an early dinner at Brax Landing, a fairly swanky restaurant overlooking the Saquatucket Harbor in Cape Cod, when a woman and a young boy were seated behind us. A server approached them and asked for a drink order.  The woman ordered a drink for herself and a Shirley Temple for her son. They began to chat, as mothers and 6-year-olds do.  But … Continue reading Overheard

You know what I could use right now? A piece of pie. With ice cream. And a cappuccino. With Bailey’s. And $80,000. Too far? Continue reading Any Given Sunday

During a recent visit to a public restroom, I discovered my roll of toilet paper was not locked in. When I pulled, it snapped off and hit the ground rolling… right under the door. Where, I’m guessing, a group of women stood there, looking down at it. I tried gently tugging on the end still in my hand, hoping to “reel it in”.  (You should … Continue reading On A Roll