Last day of vacation. Sigh… Well, if it has to end, I’m taking everyone down with me: *The ship sinks (and there was only room for one on the door). *The nerd gets the girl. *Jason is still alive. *Jack Sparrow speaks of another quest. *Verbal Kint is Keyser Söze. *Tyler Durden doesn’t actually exist. *Ned Stark loses his head. *Ross and Rachel end up together. … Continue reading Last Day Spoilers
Every morning while the coffee is brewing, I go outside to get the newspaper off the front porch…and immediately use it to start a fire in the fireplace. I love that I have no idea what is going on in the “real world” for a whole week. Vacation done right. Continue reading Vacation on Fire
This peaceful sunset was momentarily interrupted by Drinky McDouchebag next door, who stumbled onto his balcony calling for an imaginary cat…then hollering back at his “woman” to bring him another beer already if she wasn’t going to drink hers. *Burp. Continue reading Sun-up-set
You know, if the “Scary Clowns” really wanted to get us, they would set up a “Human Blind” with a Fun-Size Snickers dispenser and just pick us off one by one. Continue reading Boo!
Vacation Day 1: *Sleep in. *Brew coffee. *Take shower. *Put on new sweatshirt (super stoked because it’s FINALLY cold enough!) *Pour perfect cup of coffee and head out to the deck. *Sit in new deck chair. *Discover deck chair is actually a rocking chair. *Change into new maroon sweater (after putting coffee-stained sweatshirt in the hamper). *Fix breakfast of yogurt, peaches and granola. *Discover yogurt … Continue reading 5 o’clock
You know the saying, “There are no stupid questions…?” Well guess what? There ARE stupid questions. Dumb, moronic, idiotic questions! And the ONLY answer is, “Frankly, my dear, a box of soup could have figured that out.” Carry on… Continue reading Scarlett O’Dummy
I’m at least 2 cups of coffee short of a full brain this morning. Continue reading Mond…
Dear Spiders, Don’t you think covering everything in webs during October is a bit cliche’? Hugs withheld, Keeping it real in Waxahachie Continue reading Arachno-faux-pas
Dear Spiders, You do realize that the webs and spiders we are putting out are *decorations*, not *invitations*? Please, stop embarrassing yourselves and move along. Creeped out in Waxahachie Continue reading Web of Lies
All my life I have considered myself a Summer Girl. The long days, hot sand next to cool water, no school, Chevy-Chase-worthy vacations, and a chorus of cicadas. Sure, everyone loves spring, but those storms! And I’m sorry, but no amount of hot cocoa and skiing can hide the fact that winter sucks. But…despite My Melancholy Blues (thank you Freddie Mercury) over the shorter days, … Continue reading Out of the Fall Closet
Random Pimientos 